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Friday, October 31, 2003

I Have In My Hand The Names of 57 Members Of The BCS Board! 

I have no idea how many people sit on the BCS board. That isn't the point. What I want to know is why Joe Biden is questioning their patriotism. From the story Dan links to:Time to restart HUAC! Remember: better dead than BCS-appointed.

Huck 'Em! Huck 'Em All To Fell! 

All right. So tomorrow we'll find out if the Ducks are going to... ah, finish out the season respectably? Sure, we could win this and lose the rest, but I doubt it. With no USC game this year, all that's (arguably) challenging that's left is this and UCLA. And how challenging should this be? Not very. I'll be a bit disappointed no matter what, because I won't get to see Neuheisel shuffle off his own home field in defeat -- but it'll be a victory nonetheless.

And, whomever the ever-inadequate-feeling Beavers happen to be playing, may they dispatch them skillfully.

UO -- 48
UW -- 33

Guh-guh-GO Duh-duh-DUCKS!!!

intervene on dese nuts 

If Congress should make a stand on anything it should be how much the Huskies suck.
"The Hon. Brian Baird of Vancouver, Wash. would like to admit that the fuskies be hucked. For real. It has come to my attention that the huskies are nothing more than drugged out, disrespectful, no-talent asswipes. They are an insult to NCAA athletics and a woefully bad team. Let us hope that more attention is placed on Oregon's uniforms in the upcoming deafeat of UW rather than the pitiful lack of skill exhibited by the huskies. Thank you."

GO DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCKS

Wednesday, October 29, 2003

I do indeed smell dog shit 

To me it all boils down to the simple question of if the ducks can run the ball or not. If they can it takes pressure off of our, at times not so-dynamic duo behind center, Clemife, and UO can control the ball letting the defense rest and not be so stretched out when trying to stop the cowboy going deep.

It's not just my blinding faith in UO football that has me eyeing a win here. It's just the oft-repeated question of which UO team shows up to play. I think they can, revenge is a powerful tonic. My discouragement with the ducks is starting to fade and I hope it's worth it.

UO: 35
UW: 28

I plan on watching this game at this joint called the Wet Dog. It has "Simpsons Pinball Party" quite likely the best pinball game I've every played.

Monday, October 27, 2003

Let's hear it for the Ore. timber industry 

That lame-ass Standford tree mascot was cut down, delimbed and stacked on a logging truck bound for a mill.

Lets hope next week we can take the huskies to a vet's clinic to be fixed, put to sleep, stuffed and placed next to Mike Belloti's fireplace.



Thursday, October 23, 2003

Prediction time 

I don't know much about Standford, but I guess they suck. Well I guess you could say the ducks … no I won't say it.
I don't see them scoring more than 50 points, but I still see it pretty close. Especially because the one thing I do know is that they can shut down the run on people. Fifey, the option don't look good. And if Clemens continues to mistake UO jerseys for those of his opponents and vice versa it could git ugly. But as always I see UO pulling it out.

UO: 17
STAN: 13

OSU actually has a honored coach they call "the big pumpkin." My lord how pathetic is that.

Tuesday, October 21, 2003

Happy Birthday, Joey 

That's right, today marks Joey Harrington's twenty-fifth journey 'round the big ol' ball o' plasma.

Congratulations, Joey, on becoming one Oregon sports legend who managed not to smash your car against a rock near Hendricks Park before your first quarter century was up.

And good luck on keeping your starting position. May you not get benched before Steve Mariucci loses his job.

Special thanks to PTI for clueing me in on this very special day.

Wait a sec … you're right 

Oh I forgot about Stanford, but I guess that's easy to do. But now that you mention it I hope we destroy them, and those bastards in Berkeley. Hey we beat them we're 6-3 then OSU and Washington 8-3 … and … BOWL ELIGIBLE BABY!!!!!!!

What a rallying cry.


Monday, October 20, 2003

What's left 

Really I just want to see two things, UO beating Washington and OSU. If we can do that I'll be satisfied.

Blogfight 

Whoa, looks like there's a showdown going on at the Big O's respective Beavers and Ducks blogs. Read this first, then read this.

Is OSU having a better football season? Not by much -- although we'll see where it goes from here. Nevertheless, it seems they've got nothing better to do than gripe about us on a weekend we're off and they have a big game... which they promptly lost. Good work.

Meanwhile, when was the last time anyone here mentioned the Beavs before this post? Exactly.

Thursday, October 16, 2003

This week my crystal ball sees: 

Portland State making a surprise visit to Autzen just to hang 60 points on a UO team that spent way too much time smoking weed and drinking heavily Friday night trying to convince themselves the last three weeks was just bad luck, or a hallucination.

As to the other Otti, he can stay he has one of the best careers records in the Pac 10. I think a few heads on the coaching staff should role though to bring in a fresh look to the rest of the ducks team.

Tuesday, October 14, 2003

one more cheap shot 

I think its time for a change at the defensive coordinator position. Our defense looked completely out of place, confused and ineffecient. ASU's Walter may be good, but he looked great when he's throwing to receivers who always had two or three steps on the dbs or were totally wide open. Aliotti, I hear Montana State Northern University is hiring!! Or maybe Astoria High School!!!!!!

Wha' happened? 

Watched the ducks get blown out then went north to watch the 49ers lose by one point to a Shithawks team that should of, would have lost if not for a fumble and two blown kicks by the dudes in gold and red.
The fans in Seattle were fairly nice but I don't think they liked me repeatedly shouting Shiiiiiiiiiit Haaaaawks.

For a football weekend it was still pretty fun despite the … no wait the ducks game was just horribly bad. I don't think I can find anything redeeming there.

Let's see, I don't have much opinion on the Blazers aside from hoping they can get their sheit together, and ditch Rasheed Wallace.
That reminds me I think the 49ers should drop T.O. His big, fat, cantakerous mouth does more harm than good. And I saw him drop three bahuuu-ta-full passes from Jeff Garcia Sunday night.

But they won't. They never do.


Saturday, October 11, 2003

...

NOW IS THE TIME! 

No, it was actually the time about two weeks ago, in the first quarter against Wazzoo. That was the time. But if we're going to make a respectable showing in the Pac-10 (at least) this season, then this where it's gotta start. Ugh, no! It should have started two Saturdays ago...

Nevertheless, this game matters. Of course, with so few each season, every game matters. So let's try to win this one, huh?

So, here's my voodoo system for coming up with today's prediction: As we all know, Fifenstein and Kattle Country threw no interceptions in the first four games, then started to make up for it (big time) in the last two. And we lost those two by an overall score of 29 to 72. So if the Ducks can turn it around here -- and hey, there's no reason why they can't -- then they'll make up for the last two games with this one today.

You follow? Do I care?

DUCKS -- 72
DEVILS -- 29

Wednesday, October 08, 2003

Here's a shocker: I predict a ducks win 

I've somewhat lost a little hope with our offense, so I see this upcoming contest decided by two issues. Can the ducks cover the deep ball pass and can we apply an adequete pass rush?

If they can it'll be close, but a UO win.

The other issue is how many beers and hot wings can I shove down my gullet by halftime.

UO: 28
ASU: 20

BEERS: 8
HTWNGS: 14

LETS GO BEERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!INTOXICATE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Monday, October 06, 2003

The Comeback Trail 

So, I missed Friday's game entirely, and I guess I'm glad I did. Didn't even know it was on. Just figured it would be on Saturday. I feel a bit disloyal -- I had a great time that night; I got very drunk and I did so for free. But that's no excuse. Even if I was abducted by aliens, that would be no excuse, either.

Thanks to Summers of Arlington, Virginia, I'll be able to watch the game. And thanks to a week of laying low, I'll be able to afford more than a couple drinks while I do.

Arizona State approaches, and it's time to get serious about football again. Will the Ducks? It may be time to settle on Kellen Clemens as our principal QB. It may be time to take the X-Boxes out of the locker room. And it's definitely time to agree: Let's never to speak to Sports Illustrated again.

Go Joey 

It was an odd feeling to watch Joey H. take on the 49ers and cheer for every sack and interception.
He doesn't look like his old Oregon self back there, which I got to admit I didn't mind and even enjoyed. Perhaps his inaccuracy can be explained by this:

The DEA's office in Detroit, Michigan has issued a safety warning to parents, schools, and local communities regarding the abuse of dextromethorphan, the cough suppressant in over-the-counter cough and cold medications.  Dextromethorphan abuse is often referred to as "Robo Tripping," since many teens consume excessive amounts of Robotussin cough mediation to obtain the dextromethorphan.  There has been a rising incidence of abusing this drug in the Detroit area, and isolated deaths and overdoses have been reported throughout the United States.

Sunday, October 05, 2003

At least ASU looks pretty bad too… 

Well, I walked out of a bar in Astoria Friday night and felt like strangling someone. I remember throwing my ducks hat in the parking lot and it looking as if it may just sail off into the Columbia River. I wasn't too dissapointed, but it didn't so I picked it up and dusted it off.

One thing I was very happy about was the discipline the ducks showed in picking up those crazy Ute options, shovel passes and draws. Unfortunately the secondary forgot how to play simple man to man pass coverage.
And Clemife? Looked anemic at best with only flashes of brillance faked punt and the TD scramble.

I know no one on the loop is a fairweather, I guess I was just chumming up the waters so to speak. And hey, ain't nothing wrong with being a spoiler team now. I smell dog shit, and if there's one thing I bet our UO players can still do is eat up the Beavers.



Friday, October 03, 2003

I have full confidence... 

...that the Oregon Ducks will beat whatever team they're playing tomorrow if:

A. They take the football into the in zone more times than their opponents.

and

B. Drink their Gatorade.

Wait...what?!! They're playing RIGHT NOW? Was last week's loss so painful that they've been kicked back to the minor leagues? I thought Friday night was reserved for the high school grid iron. Will the Ducks be taking on the South Eugene Axes next week this time?

Hello duck fans? 

Surprising lack of chatter on the ol' loop these days. Did WSU absolutely dominating the ducks disappoint some of you a tad too much?

Some of you fairweatherers drop off the bandwagon?

Or perhaps you all don't realize how important this game is. If the ducks don't put away Utah, it'll be a long, long rest of the season.

If the ducks lose again, it becomes a question of if the mediocre UO team can play spoiler to the Pac 10 championship hopes of, oh just for the sake of further provocation, the hated Beavers.

Yes, oh yes, if the ducks don't beat Utah, one could argue OSU has a better team.




Wednesday, October 01, 2003

Back to reality 

Right, let me get this straight, the ducks suck now. After beating top ranked Michigan … blah blah blah.

Well, frankly my confidence in them was drastically rocked by last week's performance. And I'm not sure if the defense can handle the Utes wide open, crazy offense. If the Clemife-led offense sucks a big fat one again … they won't pull it out.

But I think they will:

UO: 24
UTAH: 17

NFL TV, DC 

TMQ shares my indignation at local football coverage out here: I've given a bit more thought to the NCAA, but now that he mentions it, I'm almost as outraged at this. East Coast bastards!

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